Sunday, November 2, 2008

You spin me right round baby, right round to the polls...

Day two of NaBloPoMo. Wow, 2 consecutive days. Impressed?

In honor of this weeks upcoming election, the ever talented Sprite's Keeper has selected the topic of Voting and Elections for this week's spin. I am not going to go into some long winded novel about why I am voting for Obama this year or philosophies on why I am a democrat. Not going to hate on the Republicans either. There is enough of that going on, fo sho.

If you have read my Twitter updates in the last few days you will know that my parents and I got into it about Obama/Biden vs. the McCain/Palin ticket. It threw me for a loop and I am still dwelling on it. Basically wondering what in the hell my parents are thinking and even wondering if it's time for a room at the nursing home? Who cares that they are only in their late fifties/early sixties. I just might need to send them to that sunny home in the hills I have mentioned (umm... threatened) to them before.

My mom called from Iowa to tell me she and my dad voted. Not something you would think warranted a phone call but since my mother insists on calling several times a day (love you mom) to tell me everything I do wrong or to give her suggestions on what I should/could be doing, I guess calling to tell me they voted isn't all that abnormal. I hear my dad yelling from the background "Go McCain! We love Sarah!" Silence from my end. I was too busy trying not to choke on my coffee to immediately respond. After I stopped myself from throwing up a little, I asked my parents if they were insane? My dad who once was a card carrying Democrat, has in the last several elections voted for Ross Perot, George W. Bush, and now John McCain. How can I be related to him? Whaaaa!!!

They started in on me about Obama being a terrorist, Biden a crook, blah blah blah. Disclaimer...I am really good at the "uh huh, whatever, you're crazy, nope, okay mom, send dad to the home" responses. It's totally not worth the argument because if you knew my parents, it's their way or the highway. No wonder I was such a dork in high school. My mom wanted a clone (she got my sister) and I seriously could be the milk man's kid.

"What experience does Obama have?" "How can you trust Biden, he's as crooked as they come." "Are you ready to spend all of Russ' paychecks on Obama's taxes?" "Doesn't Sarah Palin remind you of your mother?" Once again, if you knew my mother, you would understand that she is a bit of an ego maniac (hi mom!) and once along with my dad, ran a very successful company that they sold 5 years ago. Once a very, very business focused woman, now a grandmother with nothing else to do than call every hour and clean her huge ass house that they don't need but a few times a year when everyone is home. But anyway...

I calmly presented my point of view to which they just shook their heads. I used the excuse that Lila just shit herself and I really had to go, just to get off the phone. Hung up and let loose on poor Russ. At least he shuts up and lets me vent! Good man, that Russ is.

Two hours later my mom calls again. "Are you sure you know what and who you are voting for, young lady?" Umm, thanks mom but I am now among other things an almost 34 year old, a mother of 2, wife and college graduate. I know what and who I am voting for. Your Jedi Mind Tricks are not going to work through the phone from 600 miles away. Call your other daughter, you might have better luck. She still is attached by your really long umbilical cord. Love ya! Can the kids come and visit again soon? XOXOXO
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I do have another funny "at the polls" story.

It's no secret that we currently live in the Town That Time Forgot, Wisconsin. Our haunted house is a half of a block from City Hall. We moved here shortly before I needed to vote again and therefore needed to register here. The Little-er of the L's was a newborn. I bundled her up in the sling, put the Bigger of the L's jacket on and off we went to go vote! I stood in line with a two year old and newborn for over an hour while everyone asked me what my last name was, where I lived, who my parents were, who my in laws were, if my dogs were dangerous, when the last time my husband and I had a little nooky love (FYI...it had be a loooong time. I had a newborn for cripes sake.) I finally was up to the registration table and handed all the necessary identification to the nice octogenarian, once she finally shut up. She looked on her formal, top secret sheet o'names and promptly said as loud as possible. "Oh my, you are the new people who owe all that money for the last water bill that ______ never paid before her mother died." Remember, we were brand new to this house and to this town. Also remember that I was still trying to wrangle a two year old and a newborn as well. "You are going to need to pay that bill before we can let you vote."

I should have called the ACLU. But instead, I called my husband in a fit of rage. I did eventually get to vote and the water bill Nazi was put right in her place. There is no doubt in my mind that I will get to experience her classiness again on Tuesday.
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I'm getting a NaBloPoMo blogroll together. Let me know if you want some link love! And head on over and visit these participants. Give them some encouragement or leave a crazy comment and give them some fodder...

Cynical Dad
Down to Earth Mama
Kimblahg
Gaming With Baby
Half As Good As You
Sprite's Keeper
Cool Zebras

14 comments:

for a different kind of girl said...

My Dad, well, he had a stroke a few years ago and it impacted his speech, so if he gets worked up, he can't speak as clearly as he'd like. Needless to say, I've kind of enjoyed the silent treatment from him since he knows I didn't vote for McCain when I voted last week. I'm the only one in my family, the only one in my circle of friends, etc., who is voting Obama, but I have told them all that my guy is their next President. Then I let them bicker and mutter to themselves!

Sprite's Keeper said...

Great spin! I've always hated/enjoyed the familial political debates that gets everybody heated and rethinking what they're getting each other for the holidays. Always fun. I would be screening my calls for a while..
You're linked!

Anonymous said...

That's hilarious that your parents keep calling to try to change your vote. I guess it's good that they're active in politics at all, my parent's aren't even registered to vote. I KNOW! And here I am so hard headed about my candidate and my mom looks at me blankly when I go off on my tangents. Hope you guys can keep it civil through the rest of the election. GObama!

Kmommy said...

Hilarious!! What is up with your parents?? OMG! ;)
You know what's funny? I am from Iowa, and we just moved to the northwoods of wisconsin (population 96!) just before the voting 2 years ago... My mom called from Iowa last week to talk about the whole voting early thing. But lucky for me she still has her sanity and is/has voted for Obama! Its so horrible to see people swayed by really flawed arguments...

DeeMarie said...

Too funny!! When I still lived at home, I would go to the polls and would walk in (No ID necessary) to hear the octogenarian say aren't you (my mom with her maiden name)'s daughter? Yes. Though she's been married for over 20 years. I now go to a place where no one knows me. I show my ID, they give me my ballot. No more offers of coffee in the back or chances to see pictures of my classmate's kids...
And I'm not doing NaBloPoMo (though I really feel pressured to change my 31st post to the 1st and sign up), but I'd love to pimp myself for your blogroll anyways! :)

The Stiletto Mom said...

Wait. I'm very confused by the water bill...she actually tried to keep you from voting??? That's CRAZY!!!
I'm doing NaBloPoMo too...day three and I'm stuck for ideas!!

Joe said...

You know why Russ was so nice to absorb your vent? He was silently thanking gawd that it wasn't his mother you were venting about. :)

DeeMarie said...

Yeah, I ended up caving and joined for the month too. I'm in for NaBloPoMo!

steenky bee said...

Good luck on your namnopqrs thinger where you post ever thirty minutes or so. You are a better woman than me. Also, I think I am doing the same thing to my parents that yours are doing to you. But I threatened them with withholding their grandkids if they don't vote for Obama. Maybe I'm not very nice, you think?

Texasholly said...

Thank goodness my parents and I agree on politics...now don't get me started with religion!

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